How to Deal With a Neighbour 'Stalking' You

Originally written by Sarah Clark, updated by the editorial team on 18th May 2026

What counts as stalking by a neighbour

Stalking is often treated lightly in conversation, but when you are on the receiving end it can be deeply unsettling. A neighbour who keeps watching you, follows you, turns up wherever you go, or makes unwanted contact may have crossed the line from awkward behaviour into something the law takes seriously.

Under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997, expanded by the Protection of Freedoms Act 2012 which introduced specific stalking offences, stalking includes behaviour such as following a person, watching or spying on them, monitoring their use of the internet or email, and contacting or attempting to contact them repeatedly. It can also include loitering near your home, interfering with your property, or sending unwanted gifts or messages.

Not every uncomfortable encounter with a neighbour amounts to stalking. A single odd incident, or someone who is simply over-friendly, may not meet the threshold. However, if the behaviour forms a pattern and causes you alarm or distress, it may well qualify. The key factor is usually repetition combined with the effect the conduct has on you.

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How to respond if you think a neighbour is stalking you

Staying calm can be difficult, but it often helps. People who engage in stalking behaviour sometimes seek a reaction. If you can appear unbothered, even when you do not feel it, they may lose interest. That said, your safety comes first. If you feel genuinely threatened, protect yourself rather than worrying about how you come across.

Keep a written record of every incident. Note the date, time, what happened, and whether anyone else witnessed it. Save any messages, emails, letters or evidence of unwanted gifts. This log will be useful if you decide to report the matter to the police or take legal action later.

Avoid engaging with the person more than necessary. Do not respond to messages or attempts at contact unless you have to. If you do speak to them, keep exchanges brief and neutral. Arguing or confronting them directly can sometimes make matters worse.

Tell someone you trust what is happening. Friends, family members or colleagues can offer support and may also serve as witnesses. If you live with others, make sure they know about the situation so they can help you stay safe and keep an eye out for unusual behaviour.

If the behaviour has not yet escalated into clearly criminal conduct, mediation services may help resolve the dispute. Local councils and community mediation organisations offer schemes designed for neighbour conflicts. This will not suit every situation, and you should consider whether direct contact through a mediator might inflame things further.

Your situation may be slightly different. ask a question below ↓ and our editorial team will reply with our advice.

Reporting stalking and getting help

Stalking is a criminal offence. You can report it to the police by calling 101, or 999 if you are in immediate danger. When you report, explain the pattern of behaviour rather than describing it as a single event. Officers are trained to recognise stalking, but giving a clear picture of the repeated nature of the conduct will help them assess the risk.

The police can issue warnings, arrest the person, or refer the case to the Crown Prosecution Service. Since January 2020, they can also apply for a Stalking Protection Order to protect you at an early stage, before a prosecution is complete. In serious cases, the offender may face prosecution and, if convicted, a restraining order or prison sentence.

You can also apply for a civil injunction through the courts if you want to take action separately from, or alongside, a police report. A solicitor or legal adviser can explain which option suits your circumstances and help you weigh the risks, including the possibility that legal proceedings may increase tension with a neighbour you still live beside.

Several organisations offer support to stalking victims in the UK. The Suzy Lamplugh Trust runs the National Stalking Helpline on 0808 802 0300. Victim Support provides free and confidential help regardless of whether you have reported to the police. Citizens Advice can explain your legal options and signpost local services. Check their websites for current contact details before calling.

Protecting yourself day to day

While you wait for matters to be resolved, there are practical steps you can take. Vary your routines where possible so your movements are less predictable. Check your home security and consider whether better locks, lighting or a doorbell camera would help you feel safer.

Review your privacy settings on social media. Stalkers sometimes use online information to track their targets. Limiting what you share publicly can reduce the risk.

If the stalking continues or escalates, update the police. Each new incident adds to the record and may prompt them to take stronger action. You are entitled to ask for a review of your case if you feel the response has been inadequate.

Legal protections exist and support is available, though the process can be slow and outcomes are not guaranteed. Taking the situation seriously from an early stage, keeping records, and reaching out for help can make a real difference.

The Next Step

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Showing 20 of 286 questions

Ask Problem Neighbours a Question

ProblemNeighbours Editor 25/08/2026 at 3:00 pm

@Monique Jones Sorry to hear you're going through this, it sounds really wearing. We can't ring readers back from here, but you can report harassment and stalking to your local police on 101, or 999 if you feel unsafe. It's also worth contacting the National Stalking Helpline on 0808 802 0300 for proper advice on next steps. Keep a written log of every incident with dates and times, as it'll really help any case you make.

Monique Jones 25/08/2026 at 2:38 pm

Can some one please give me a call back a help lead me in the right direction due tobyhe faction getting harassed and stalked by my neighbors every day

ProblemNeighbours Editor 29/07/2026 at 2:01 am

@jane You're not overreacting at all. What you're describing goes well beyond nosey neighbours; the pattern of turning up wherever you go, tracking your workplace and monitoring your clothing is intrusive and genuinely unsettling. You did the right thing going no contact, and you've nothing to feel guilty about. If it escalates or you feel unsafe, keep a written log of incidents and report it to your local police on 101, as sustained behaviour like this can meet the threshold for harassment.

jane 29/07/2026 at 1:29 am

My neighbour and her family have been stalking me for over 5 years. I have always been pleasant to them but their behaviour has become increasingly intrusive. When I go out she always comes out and asks me where I am going. I have tried to fend her off politely but she insists saying that she is just nosey. She can see that it makes me uncomfortable but just carries on. She asks me unwanted questions about my place of work and routines. If I wait at the local bus stop her son asks me where I am going. Additionally ,she and her family turn up frequently at places they know I go and it really seems more than coincidental due to the frequency of theses 'meetings' .She watches everything that my partner ,my family and I do commenting on my clothes and can often describe in detail what I was wearing on a particular occasion. If I have a workman to my house she insists on having the same person doing a job for her and insists upon me giving her their details this has happened on more than a few occasions. I started a new job in a shop recently and she somehow found out where and wanted to know what days I was working. I have put up with this for a long time but I began to dread going out of my house as she or one of her family nearly always appeared. I no longer speak to any of them so I do not have to put up with their intrusions. Now I feel guilty and as though I have overreacted but it was beginning to make me very unhappy. I am also angry with myself for allowing it to happen and not establishing clearer boundaries to begin with.
Is this behaviour normal and I the one in the wrong or have I got a legitimate complaint?

ProblemNeighbours Editor 17/05/2026 at 1:30 pm

@Laura1989 That sounds genuinely awful and what you're describing goes well beyond "trivial", so please don't accept that label from the police. Keep logging every incident with dates, times and CCTV clips, and ask for a crime reference number each time you report, even if they fob you off. Push for a formal harassment complaint under the Protection from Harassment Act, and consider speaking to a solicitor about a non-molestation or civil harassment order. Also raise it with your MSP and Victim Support; they can put real pressure on Police Scotland to take it seriously.

Laura1989 09/05/2024 at 11:15 am

We have had issues with older couple next door and their son. We are young couple with a 4 year old son. Things are so bad that their sons girlfriends mum has been charged with hate crime against me she mocked my illness We are due in court in 3 weeks. We share steps that's it the wife keeps trying speak to my son even though police told her stop, when my partner is at work he's coming out and sitting right next to me on steps, he will come out back yard follow me up and down garden, anytime I go out he always comes out he has followed me to collect my bins I have cctv footage of this. I've not reported him following me yet but police scotland said I cannot stop her talking to my little boy. I have been collecting all my footage for evidence. The woman who has been charged has no bail conditions and is parking outside my window when dropping her daughter off so I see her. Police not helping me told me it's trivial. Local council not helping either want us do mediation I do not want that man anywhere near me he gives me creeps. I even heard her say let's hope she dies from a seizure I have epilepsy, what kind of person wishes a child was wothout a mum. They are lying we are the problem even though last 3 tenants moved because of them. We are not moving this is our dream home.

A 04/04/2024 at 10:48 pm

I have a very probmatic neighbour he is a person around 50 who lives alone next door to me, when I moved in it was fine then bit at a time he begun making noise at early in the morning 3am-4am when I would say to him I have work tomorrow he would just walk of and slam he's door, I've only ever been nice to him but he's always angry he has mental health issues, if I get in from work or anywhere when I walk through my front door he will open he's front door and slam it as loud as he can, he bangs on the door in hallway late at night it was now and then it is now constant everyday up to 20 times a day he has cameras around if a person walks past he bangs on the wall if a car pulls up he barricades hes front door im exhausted living next door I'm trying to get a move but it's taking ages, any advice?. thanks

Shar 01/11/2023 at 12:08 pm

Have a neighbor that sits in carport behind screens and watches us, when people go in and out next door (he lives 2doors away) he comes out of house or from behind screens outs hand on hood and watches until they are in and out(I suppose the neighbor is calling him for this) . It has happened for 3years. He yelled he was going to get us, beat us up , put us in jail. Took to
Police, they said we are problem, because my husband wanted to explain property rights. We tried putting up fencing, but the yard in 650 feet only and expensive. So he has people sit across street from our yard and we watch them
Go to his house before or after. We have cameras up.

Jamesnice8 23/09/2023 at 5:16 pm

If your neighbours are stalking you you need to find out why there stalking you your neighbours cud just be flying monkeys stalking you for a sex predator or for a narcissistic stalkers if you are been stalk then you got to no your stalkers if you just move house your stalkers well follow you to your new address and they well tell your neighbours things about you to let them in most times neighbours well let them in you see stalkers and narcissistic well pay them to let them in and if they have no money they well indefinitely well let them in if your stalkers or narcissistic stalkers talk about you everyone where you live well think bad things about you your stalkers want and well destroy you and your neighbours well help them do so because your neighbours as been told that your a paedophiles or something like that is how stalkers get neighbours involved by telling them lis about you they well offer them money cars do there house up everything they can to get in there but most of your neighbours well let them in to stalk you for the rite price

Karma 04/09/2023 at 1:40 pm

USA small town where the sheriff pretends to know the law, but apparently thinks it’s funny that a local born is stalking people. When I got fed up and tried to report it they refused to take a report saying that she moving just let her go and leave it alone. Because she was there every day and calling every day had 3-4 cameras including drones watching me. Then she somehow manipulated someone a block away from me to letting her live there for 6 months. Car lot empty grass area with one house between her clear view of my front door setting up a sensor light that triggered from my door to the tree in my yard. Tried chasing me off the highway but I have better driving skills and wow was she mad when she came around the bobber( semi with no trailer) that I used to get away from her,pointing at me as I slammed the brakes in the turning lane. Over a year and a half of this stuff and I honestly believe it’s still going on. She got a young helper who helped her get drones and helped her set up hard wired cameras and other equipment. He just as guilty as she is. There’s so much more to this that I can’t even begin to describe it all. She then moved down to where my son is living and I swear she is stalking him. She was in the army she seems to have some fantasy that she is some kind of law enforcement agent. How can the army train these people and be ok with turning them loose on the public? It’s sickening. These cops are so dirty In butler county Iowa that the whole department should be shut down. I’m currently working on finding a place to move away from this area. My biggest fear is she will fallow me. I don’t know why she has fixated on me. But she has even pointed a laser sighted gun at my head waited up for me to get home came out in the pouring rain to move rocks around in the front of her deck just to let me know she watching. How can I change my name and move without her knowing and what can I do about my grown son being watched? Because he doesn’t care and he doesn’t pay attention like I do. Thanks to her I am permanently hyper vigilant. I have researched and researched and I am so unset that nothing is being done to hold these stalkers accountable. She has destroyed my life. I have no peaceful enjoyment anymore because I am on guard all the time.

Jason 28/06/2023 at 1:23 am

I live in St Petersburg Florida and purchase my home on August 22nd 2005 I lived there happily until about 2 years ago when my neighbor across the street decided to call codes enforcement on me for issues that were not related to me in any way. He continued to report me to codes incessantly for stupidity. He couldn't talk to me like a man he's a loser old guy who has a big fat mortgage on his house while I have none. He called the cops more than 300 times in the last 2 years to report me for anything from walking down the alley at night to anything that he could think of at the last minute to try to get me in trouble. He even staged drugs and part of my house to get me arrested. This horror is real and it is turned me into a very reticent and hateful human being. If that man comes on my property it'll be the last thing he ever does. He is an imminent threat and I've told him not to talk to me but he sits outside and camps there documenting with his multiplex cinematic cameras system and a diary that he keeps of my Cummings and goings. If that's not stalking, I don't know what is. The police have taken his side because he's a senior citizen whereas I'm under the mark of being one. The cops are no good, corrupt and non sympathetic to the laws themselves. I don't trust them, they will say and do anything and even Rob your house while they're arresting you. The City of St Petersburg codes compliance department is the most pathetic lying, conniving cheating, thieving and evil empire that ever existed in the city government. The man across the street is the devil himself but, they can rest assured that they will never enter my home or threaten my security directly because I will defend myself.

Joy123 13/05/2023 at 8:22 pm

Hi,
I have similar experience when I lived in a flat for 4 years.
I thought been on the top floor which was 3rd floor will minimize hearing noises from below but found out I was so.wrong.
Moved to a house where I was at the end of the terrace and was having the neighbours following me from room to room.
Where they can't follow, they come out of their house so that you can see them.
Basically stalking in my own house.
I they do these things as a form.of intimidation and control.

Julie 12/05/2023 at 5:53 pm

Fighting words are those that "by their very utterance inflict injury or tend to incite an immediate breach of the peace." So, essentially a call to imminent and specific lawless action. However, while the supreme court keeps asserting that "fighting words" can be regulated, no set of language that has come before them in the past half-century has actually constituted fighting words. So, unclear what language would actually qualify

I reported this while ago but it has gotten so far. They are exploding me now in the house I'm staying at. They don't want to leave but I hear the phones dropping from high areas and keep waking up to loud banging down stairs and them making noises abusing me verbally, I'm sick and tired of the waiting for me to respond to the police, they said they want to sue that they are recording little excuses... Told them to go but they have another day and I Hurd they said they are staying to continue another week Exploding us. It's abuse he's allowing to disturb people's homes. Everyone outside expect someone to call cops and calling it out like everyone is and he's not doing nothing about it but allowing it to stay in house

((Classifying the Types of Liars · Deceitful liars: those who lie to others about facts · Duplicitous liars: those who lie to others about their values · Delusional))

In killers and psychopaths, however, these brain processes are effectively desensitized… Telling a lie and a truth is one and the same for them.

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Esme 06/05/2023 at 1:42 am

I’m posting on here as I really don’t know what to do and hoping I can get some advise
I had a new neighbour move next door to me a year and four months ago
From the first day he moved in i haven’t had one day where he hasn’t blasted music singing so loud you feel like he’s in the same room as you this goes on all day and into the late evening myself and my daughter haven’t slept a full night since he moved in I didn’t say anything at first but after six months of putting up with it we had had enough i work and my daughter is at college and it was affecting thay but also us mentally I suffer with ptsd due to fleeing an abusive relationship and was placed here for safety reasons we reported tje noise to our housing association they told him his behaviour wasn’t acceptable so he then started retaliating by getting louder making stupid noise late at night tapping on the walls and antagonising my dog when he is in the back garden I reported it again it eventually got passed to our local council anti social behaviour team we were offered mediation he refused to do it

But now his behaviour is actually turned wierd and I really am frightened
He installed cameras outside his house which he’s well within his rights to do but he’s only got them installed to watch me he’s got three out the front of his house he’s positioned them so there is one where he can see me coming in and out of our street one so he can see me walking past his gate and one pointing into my front garden there is one in his back garden looking into my garden everytime me or my daughter are in our garden he comes to his window and either records us on his phone or try’s to hide behind his curtain and record us
Or he leans right out of his window glaring at us until we feel uncomfortable and go inside he knows exactly what times I’m coming and going from my house as he told another neighbour he hates me and is watching me and told them he knows what time I leave he told the neighbour he’s gonna get me back that beighbour reported it but nothing got done about it .
Two weeks ago I was coming home from work and he said to me I know where you work and was laughing at me
And only two days ago as I was coming out of work he was driving past my work could be coincidence but I doubt it

My freind said he is stalking me but I don’t know I don’t know what to do

Chel 12/03/2023 at 7:09 pm

My husband recently passed away, and these neighbors just moved in not even a month ago. I started noticing the neighbor he is a military man using his phone filming. My girls going out of the house in the house or when even when they have friends over he even goes on top of his roof to film on my property he also has drums fly over my property, but apparently having Cameras pointing at my windows, my windows in the bathroom and my windows in my rooms my front door my back door he’s got sensors in my driveways and my back doors and front doors. I went to the place about it. The protective order was dropped. I also took him to court him and his wife to court, because his wife is now stocking me as well only know them because of their actions, I don’t know who else to turn to all I’m trying to do is protect me my children and my property. As of right now he’s got over 30 cameras, pointing in the back of my house in about 15 in the front of my house not including the six beside each of our houses I got ATT but somehow the Wi-Fi connection hasn’t been working since they moved in. Please help.

Pb 18/02/2023 at 6:09 am

I have been living at my home for over 20 years a family moved in next door violated property line called police had land surveyed again and remarked. His brother or cousin has stalked us for a few years he wants this house he now getting more aggressive with friends pulls in driveway and property damage. Sent out roofers and others to my home. when they have left not neighborhood but drove back to his house in back of cul de sac. They stalked change cars rumor has it him and others in back or x cons and sex offenders. He and his brother do have a crime past for stealing and selling drugs. Can not move because of new laws in state. Be sued if they home invade while out got less than 11 years left on mom mortgage.what can I do???

Anonymous 24/01/2023 at 9:35 am

My husband son and I moved in our home 7 almost 8 years ago. We have a neighbor who lives not on top of us us but within eye sight and walking distance. He started coming over the minter we moved in. It got worse to where he would only come when my husband was sleeping or gone to work. When I would take my son outside he would pop up or be banging on my door. If I went out somewhere he had tracked how long I was gone for talking about down to the second when I returned after months of this I was terrified and my husband went outside who was sleeping when he woke up and spoke to him. He did not return until yesterday when I was at work and my husband took my son to the doctor where he waited until we were all gone and then left a note specifically for me. Now I'm freaking out realizing that that situation has never really cleared up as I know now he watched our home and waited until we were gone to leave this note.

Karine 10/01/2023 at 5:33 pm

I have been dealing with a neighbor who lives below my apartment unit that blasts music so loud, that ground in my apartment literally shakes. I reached out to my management and they continuously ignored me until a 4th attempt. They sent out notices and my neighbor began to retaliate. He began playing music loud when I come home from work, or creating loud banging noises. I then began working remotely and he started rushing out of his apt the same exact time and posturing like he is ready to fight me. It happened multiple days in a row at different times. I stayed home for a week bc no matter what time I go out, he is following me out next to my car. I've tried parking far off in different spaces to avoid him but he has even moved his car in the middle of the night to park beside mine. I filed a non emergency police report, and they spoke to my apt manager but they do not care and haven't done anything about it. They also don't even know who this man is living in the apt. My lease doesn't end until July 2023. I can't escape bc he is right below my unit, knows when I come and go, keeps up with where I park in different places. The police says they cannot do anything without video evidence. Any advice would be helpful. Thanks

Ree ree 21/12/2022 at 3:56 pm

My neighbor built his ground up thirty feet bringing it to the top of my fence. He and his relatives with stand there and watch my friends, relatives for hours. We built our fence up 10 feet, he then put cameras high up on the trees on my pool, hot tub and decks and also on my drive and front and back yard total 10 tree cameras. He put his boat directly next to my back yard he sits in it during snow storms and makebates watching us. I received their delivers from Amazon which including a stun gun, a camera jam blocker (he tries to black out my cameras) and tried to jam my WIFI. My unique last name shows up as WIFI connections near me. I know they have been in my house it has a weird smell and my dog got sick a few weeks later I pulled up he was removing a hose near my fence and several empty bottles of anti freeze.

Me 15/12/2022 at 11:14 pm

My neighbor stalked me in the past a couple years ago. He lives right across from me in my apartment building. It started with him telling me he loved me and trying to kiss me. I told him I didn't want to talk to him any more. He starts knocking on my door every day multiple times a day. I would never answer. He did this for three months straight. He stopped when I left a note on my door that I was calling the police. I told him after to stop saying hi to me but he still does it every time he sees me.

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