Home > Who to Contact > Being Bullied by a Neighbour? What You Can Do

Being Bullied by a Neighbour? What You Can Do

By: Sarah Clark (ILEX) - Updated: 20 May 2022 | comments*Discuss
 
Bully Bullies Neighbour Harassment

If you, or anyone in your household, feel as though you’re being bullied in your neighbourhood or even your own home, it can potentially make your life unbearable. You have the right to feel safe in your own neighbourhood and protected from harassment, so don’t let a bully take that away from you or your loved ones.

Children Being Bullied

Bullying is a common problem, especially with children. In some cases, a bullying incident may be a one-off, a trivial falling out between children, and isn’t necessarily anything to worry about.

Listen to what your child is saying about the bullies and keep an eye on the situation. It may all blow over.In the meantime, arm your children with strategies to deal with the actions the bullies are taking, such as trying to ignore minor things, asking the bully to stop, and telling an adult.

If a child is being picked on frequently, you could try walking with them to school, supervising play areas or speaking to the parents of the bully or bullies and trying to resolve the issues amicably.

In very serious cases, or examples where there have been actual physical violence, it might be possible as a last resort to take out a restraining order, making the parents and the bullies stay away from your child. If the situation has become that serious or dangerous, it’s advisable to involve the police, get some information on your legal options, and consult a lawyer. Thankfully, it’s rare for childhood bullying to need that sort of intervention.

What’s Considered Bullying?

Bullying and harassment, especially when adults are involved, can be subtle, hard to pinpoint and consist of many separate incidents which can turn into persistent bullying when they are carried out repeatedly or over a long period of time. It is important to know how you are protected under the Protection From Harassment Act.

If you’re being subjected to any form of unwanted behaviour from a neighbour, it can be described as bullying. It could take the form of constant harassment, physical or verbal abuse. Name calling or teasing constantly can be bullying if they upset you or cause you any distress. Some bullies may choose to simply 'blank' you or spread rumours about you. Serious cases may even involve threatening or anti-social behaviour.

In some cases, neighbourhood bullies can be so subtle and their actions can become so regular that their behaviour can be overlooked. That doesn’t make it right. Long term, bullying can cause mental and physical health problems, and affect your well-being.

What to Do if You’re Being Bullied

The very nature of adult bullies make them hard to reason with. You can try avoiding the culprit and hoping they get bored with annoying you, if the bullying is mild.

Kill them with kindness. If the bully sees you as a threat, try befriending them, even if you don’t want to. If you turn the tables and act as if you’re willing to be friendly, you could get a positive response. Try a friendly 'hello' or offer to help them with something. This might not work, but is worth trying as a first course of action.

Try being assertive, too. Use assertive body language, stand straight, don’t avoid eye contact, and confront them with statements like, "I've noticed that you seem to be trying to bully me and I would like you to stop."

If all else fails, or the bullying becomes serious or physical, involve the authorities.

If there’s a discrimination element (you’re being bullied because of your race, gender, disability, sexuality or religion), contact your local authority who may be able to take action. Some local authorities have Safer Neighbourhood Teams who work with communities to identify and address local concerns.

In some cases, a local authority can apply for a court order against the perpetrator, banning them from carrying out anti-social behaviour, nuisance or threats against you or your household, and even evict them if they carry on.

You may be able to take out a civil injunction against the bully. Take advice from a solicitor about your options and what you need to do if that’s the case. Find out more about the Proection from Harassment Act here.

You might also like...
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice..
[Add a Comment]
I know people say that you should kill others with kindness but what happens when that kindness just provokes others what happens if you live in a neighborhood and you’re the only one of your race and religious beliefs. I had allowed my neighbors to not invite me to community watch for the last five years and also filed a report against me that my dogs are vicious which I had to go there and get a certification stating that they are docile and nonaggressive to protect my dogs. i’ve been called all kinds of things and even had neighbors come up directly to me to ask why my Kind is here I did not really understand because I am white so I assume that it was my Jewish background and I am aware that I live in a black neighborhood and I understand maybe they feel suspicious about me because I am white I’m not sure. I am on the spectrum and I see things differently and I cannot relate to racism the same I went to an all black high school and I worked around a lot of Black people and I never really felt different but moving here to the south in this neighborhood I would say that I am being discriminated on. When I’ve tried to report my neighbor for threats of using poison to kill one of my cats. I was told told to go back home by the cops. I was also asked what I was crying about it was just a feral cat but simply the fact knowing that she was going out of her way to kill an animal made me hysterical it wasn’t long after that the cat died from poisoning and no actions were filed after they found out the fak police report her and her husband filed was fake no further action was taken. Not shortly after that on Father’s Day around 9:30 PM 10 shots were fired into my backyard while me and my dogs were playing. They didn’t take it serious nor did they say it was a hate crime I would just like to know as a white person living in a black neighborhood what exactly is happening to me and what can I do to protect myself and my pets?
jacqueline - 20-May-22 @ 6:56 PM
Happened again.....10:08 am EST the ignorant bully new neighbors went outside and the mean loud dogs were barking again...somebody please help me.I can’t cope with this hell....how can I get back at them?I don’t deserve this...
Monikab - 14-May-22 @ 3:44 PM
Since February, I have been blocked 5 times, these bully neighbors have their dogs bark non stop and don’t stop it, have trespassed on my property damaging the lawn with their dogs waste, have trespassed multiple times, have come near my car multiple times, had someone come over numerous times with a motorcycle, continue to wake me up after 9 pm.Last night after 8:50 pm woke me up with their loud aggressive barking dogs aiming toward my window.They even come out after 7 am in the morning.They walk their dogs more then 5 times a day making sure. O other dogs and their owners can be walked.Their dogs almost killed my dog by cornering him and almost killing him.A week later was in the kitchen and heard squealing from a smaller dog in the neighborhood, which tells me those maniacs had their dogs bite another neighbor dog.Please help me.I am in distress, can’t sleep and so afraid.I am traumatized.These are dangerous people.I can go on and on of how bad these people are and the very bad things they did to me already.
Monikab - 14-May-22 @ 2:17 PM
HI the landlord of the house next door is bullying me into rebuilding his wall. during the high winds in January my fence and his wall came down. The wall and my fence fell into my garden.My fence has been up since 2013 the fencer at the time decided to use bolts as no room for posts so placed bolts into fence with space in between. The landlord knew of this at the time but did nothing, now he is being abusive and swearing on the phone and is insisting I build this wall. I am a lady living on my own and frighten that he may come to my door, so Im hardly at home now. Pauline Brown
pauls - 10-May-22 @ 12:24 PM
I have experienced antisocial behaviour by an immediate female neighbour for nine years now. She shouts at me.Had a mirror put near her gate so that she could see when I came of my home in order to come across and abuse me in her language. I never used my sitting room or garden for 7yrs due to her behaviour. The Housing Assoc did very little other than encourage me to move to a new landlord and in doing so give up a very secure tenancy.No. BUT now I realise this woman is consumed by envy. Took a long time to accept this. And I still feel a bit afraid of her. But I won't be a "victim" anymore. I ignore her and find positive things to do. Sanctions do notdterherand I believe she has mental health issues - no normal sixty something woman would normally behave like this. Luckily she is now targeting others, therefore there are now other witnesses to her behaviour. Latest thing she had a go at contractors building a high fence in my garden. Got hysterical. It's on my garden and it was ordered to be built by the HA. Good news I cannot see her anymore due to height of fence. But only had this work done after my complaint to the Housing Ombudsman.
Protector - 1-Apr-22 @ 12:24 PM
Can I get my neighbour charged for spreading lies about me. She has accused me of selling drugs, having affairs, slapping another neighbour, all are untrue. She is a hairdresser and telling all these lies to her clients. She has threaten to get me kicked out, to get my daughter taking off me.
Blackie - 29-Mar-22 @ 11:27 PM
My elderly neighbour is a nightmare. Since I’ve lived at this house she has done nothing but throw abuse at me and harass me the minute I step foot in my back garden. I can not even go and pick up my dogs mess without being shouted at. We are both housing association. The first time I reported her to our housing officer she told me there was nothing they could do without evidence and that she’s an old lady and she is probably lonely. Well swearing at me threatening me and spitting at me does not mean she that she is lonely. The second time I reported her I had video her and sent this to our housing officer who once again can not be bothered. I have recently found out that my neighbour and housing officer are friends. I have a lot of health conditions and mental health problems and this situation is not helping at all. I don’t know what to do any more
Rcaz - 11-Nov-21 @ 8:21 AM
Ive been the victim of neighbour abuse from a middle age female. The female has also been taken to court for threats to harm my other neighbours and it went to court twice. Unfortunately the female has really bad mental health issues and she turned up in court with her support worker's. The female got away with her threats and abuse and basically was given a single bungalow to move her away from honest folk. In my mind she was rewarded for her bad behaviour. I was approached by our housing officer to make a statement for the housing association behalf so help with the court case. That was the worst thing I ever did because the other parties gets to read all statements and now I'm the victim of abuse in the streets from this nasty lady. Everytime I see her in the streets my heart race's off to such an extent that I have panic attacks. I was given different alarms for windows and for front and back door plus a personal alarm to carry around with me. The police supplied all the alarms and yet when I get abuse from her according to the police before they can do anything about it I need to gather evidence so the police can do something about it! Im 49 bold!!...lots of tattoos and very short!! Can you imagine what I look like to the male desk Sargent who im reporting it to?? The copper almost laughed at my situation??...saying you need evidence!! Ive not got a fancy phone with all the gubbins to video. My last point about the female bully!!...she is well known by the mental health services and unfortunately she always threatened to commit suicide if her old dog was to pass over? She has a big history of attempting suicide when she don't get her own way plus she has a bad history of fighting anyone who may want to stand up for themselves?? If the housing/police/courts and mental health team can't sort her out then what chances do I have of being left alone from her!!?? I say all of this because bullies can often get away with if for years and years... Nobody is taking this serious and I'm sure its because I'm a male getting picked on by a female. I thought i was doing the right thing when my housing officer asked for my support now im asking for support and its landing on deaf ears.
Adie - 10-Nov-21 @ 3:15 PM
Exactly the same happened to me in my ignorant suburbian neighborhood disaster touristbullies screaming in front of my home for years cuz I am a single mom into music art and educating , they don t dare to do this to anyone else ,All becuz they think I am weak or something? Plus the women who have nothing to do but have their man work for them , r extremely jealous at my occupation ,they ve robbed me and my family theyhave stalked their kids and their victim friendsintothrowning stones in my garden , try to run me over on purpose with their car , plus turned other neighbours against me with slander gossip. Never have I met such bad people anywhere elseI got good friends all over the world ?? happily there are nice people further down.That one doesnt loose hope for the future....
Joanne - 6-Oct-21 @ 9:23 AM
I have been being bullied for a while now at my apartment complex I did everything my landlord advised me to do for example call the police, report all issues to her , but it's as if she adds fuel to the flame intentional. I can't leave my apartment without being stared at , and called name's I'm currently living in constant fear for my kidssafety and mines. Any advice?
Angie - 5-Oct-21 @ 7:01 PM
We have two bullies in our block who are father and son, they only live a few houses apart. They constantly try to scare other neighbors into leaving. Because it's 2 families, it's really intimidating. At the moment they're making semi-daily complaints against a woman that they've hated for no discernible reason since the day she moved in. They haven't turned on us yet, but I feel like it's a matter of time. What's worse, I've noticed that some of the other neighbors are now doing their bidding to avoid becoming a target. It feels like a schoolyard out here.
MarcyD - 4-Oct-21 @ 1:10 PM
My neighbours are 73 and 61, they have spent two years intimidating and bullying the other two neighbours, with words and actions. when we call authorities they put on "nice old people" act and nothing can be done. My neighbour is now on antidepressants and i have beta blockers for anxiety. they were screaming at the weekend because I walked across an open courtyard, they don't like that. no one sees the evil monster that screams and shouts at everyone, lets her husband pull ugly faces at my elderly neighbour as she stands there crying and then they laugh at what they are doing to her. we don't know what else to do.
fed up with it - 20-Sep-21 @ 11:52 AM
The issue with my next door neighbour has been going on since the day I moved here that was seven years ago. Firstly, they gave me two false names, I didn't have a problem with them at first, but I had to call the police because they began chanting homophobic words, threatening its really difficult to explain to anyone how that effects if its on characteristics. The police was useless, the council are useless and any continued reporting the behaviour is useless. And I can't agree with the information on this website to be the right approach. All that's changed they don't use homophobic words, but it's still mind games, name calling, stalking, violation and trespassing, damage to property. The last confrontation they refused to move from my backdoor. I told them its trespassing but their response was its their entitlement to stay there, (this happens 3am 4am in the morning sometimes) there are loops in the law they use to defend their behaviour. I've installed cctv their retaliation was to place a camera on me, and watch me coming and going. Its a horrible neighbourhood I wish I'd never moved here, regret it entirely.
Wolfgang - 15-Sep-21 @ 3:01 PM
I have a neighbour who is constantly bodyshaming me. Earlier husband used to tell to my parents to get me married off since age 10. Now it's the wife who has started body shaming. She is convincing my mother to tell me to do some exercise calling me fat. My mother instead of replying back agreed to her and pressurises me to do exercise which she said. It's just too much.
Ramya - 10-Sep-21 @ 12:33 AM
The reason why your neighbor bullies you is because he wants to make your life so uncomfortable that you give up and move out. Stand your ground, be assertive, it's a phycological warfare. Your bully neighbor is there to teach you a lesson on how to become mentally stronger. Try not to surrender and move out quickly, there is no guarantee that your next neighbor won't try to bully you again.
jeffsmith - 2-Aug-21 @ 3:20 AM
I don't know where to go I live next door to these people who arehorrible to me.My ex is black. They torture me. They send there pitbull out every time they see me. I've done everything to ask them to stop. They call me names. They had done this to my son years ago at 12. They called They police on him just walking home with his friends. Police think I'm crazy. I'm not. Last year she graduated and now teaches at plano isd. I have no idea what to do anymore. I'm a prisoner in my own house.
Jon - 27-Jul-21 @ 1:10 AM
I have a semidatached house. The neighbours on the left hand side they are council tenants. They keep removing my fence panels & throw it into my garden. This is deliberately done. When I put in new fence panels they move it around. I also painted the house recently. My choice was a bright yellow. They started critising the colour & swearing at me, while I was in the garden. What can I do further?
Glo - 24-Jul-21 @ 6:25 PM
Hi i am friends with a neighbor who has trouble with a man who lives on my street , he keeps coming to my house smashing my plants in garden and threatening me he has assaulted my neighbor by punching him causing him to brake his cheekbone! Now he wont leave me alone he keeps coming and banging on my door and threatening me ? This is nothing to do with me and i dont no what to do about it because if i call the police or anything like that i will get called a grass and im scared it will make it worse what can i do ?
Leeds - 13-Jul-21 @ 1:52 PM
2 of my neighbours keep reporting me and my daughter to the police because we park our cars in the crescent as we don't have a drive way those have drive ways where they park there's but because they can't fit all of them in there. They keep scratching my car. They reported my daughter saying her car wasn't tax and insured which it was. Now the police have been around again stating a report had been made she was smoking weed my daughter does not even smoke. These bullies are policeinformers so get away with selling drugs and everything else. The women keep shaking their heads at my 17 year old daughter. What can we do x
Louise - 10-Jul-21 @ 11:52 AM
Why are my comments being removed from this site? I used no offensive language and accused no one by name.
Desperate - 5-Jul-21 @ 3:34 PM
A person is very lucky to have a home with decent neighbors.You throw the dice when you buy or rent.Unless you have enough space around you, there is an good chance that some neighbor will be a problem.If you have a neighbor problem, there is a good chance that you won't get any help. All you can do is get out of a bad situation and hope you will get a better one.
Wally - 3-Jul-21 @ 9:00 PM
My neighbors especially the 19 year old son is trying to intimadate me he throws face masks out of his bedroom window throws weights on my ceiling walks past my window staring in shouts loud if I sit outside has damaged things in my garden council won't do nothing he is a black family that should not make a difference he's trying to drive me out making me very depressed
Sammy - 14-Jun-21 @ 6:02 PM
When I've got more time I'll tell you about my neighbour battles.It's a long story but finding all these people struggling hopefully makes me less alone.There HAS to be better firmer laws and legal help to eradicate so much that can go wrong living next to people who do the things just because currently They Can!!!! Their craziness which yes...like in my sorry saga that's gone off and on for twenty one years!!! is beyond comprehension.I've not been well for twenty eight years and I'm not moving until I get a fair price and frankly no one in their right mind would buy where I live.
Round 3 - 13-Jun-21 @ 5:43 PM
Neighbour upstairs started banging on Xmas eve/day. With guests over etc. The neighbour next door was already doing it throughout night in bedroom. Upstairs started following from room to room and next door still on standby whenever I walk into bedroom. Handful of times I’ve shouted SHUT UP. I’ve been arrested, sectioned, mis-diagnosed with hearing things - psychosis, given 2 final warnings, had a sound machine (I was confident but it didn’t work), being forced to sign aba and being forced to take antipsychotics, meanwhile, my downstairs neighbour knocks to tell me he’s heard all the commotion over the last few days and finds me crying in the hallways.
Trapped - 11-Jun-21 @ 11:41 PM
I have 3 households intimating and bulling me I live on my own, my property out side has been damaged and I was accused recently of taking a photo of a neighbors child which is completely untrue. These neighbours have taken over the Close where I live All started of a dog off lead and myself fear of being bitten. I feel nervous of going outside now Help me please
Willow - 11-Jun-21 @ 7:10 PM
I finally had a psychotic breakdown and i am now on stronger tablets and visits to the psychiatrist because I was getting more and more paranoid and anxious every night because of my neighbours. They are still carrying on listening, moaning etc but I am calmer and leaning to ignore it. One good thing came out of this I definitely know I'm not doing anything wrong watching my tv with sound instead of subtitles. The doctor informed me that i am not doing anything wrong
Depressed - 6-Jun-21 @ 3:27 PM
We have been getting bullied by a barristers Clark. She is a racist and throws monkey nuts over the fence. She has a spy camera that points at our property at all times and she has just put cctv cameras with audio so she can listen to our conversations. She constantly complains to my landlord and to the police and has reported me to the DWP the lies is unbelievable and she abusers her power. So wtf ?? she’s evil
P - 31-May-21 @ 5:21 AM
Wonder if anyone could help Iv been bullied and harassed for about year now from my neighbour I have over 20 police incidents and now they using the walk way access to come across my garden and use that as excuse to bully me what can I do
Nicole - 27-May-21 @ 4:37 PM
I live in an apartment found out later how much I can hear my downstairs and upstairs neighbors so I'd remind myself and my company to keep it down respecting my neighbors. Above me was constant stomping so much noise if I didn't know I wouldve thought the Jesse white tumblers live and practiced up to here and didn't think much of it after a while I heard them walking around in cowboy boots and heels all day everyday not sure they ever slept or even ate so I thought I'd write a note asking if I'm disturbing them to let me know and I apologize nice neighborly letter and it pissed them off stomping around like a one man marching band bowling who knows but im not sure why it did I let it go and ignored it while later I'd make joke I swear the people upstairs are in every room I go to just a coincidence, but it happened way to often so they must see me somehow if they're following me from room to room to make a long story short I got a Rf detector detected devices in the corners of my ceiling walls and covered those areas after covering most my upper walls and ceilings they stopped and then started to hear alot of drilling and sawing then water pouring on my ceiling like buckets being thrown on my living room ceiling it started to make waves in it and sag in places but never seeped thru to cause water stains somehow it dried and have no evidence it's them that did it and now they're filling my walls up with something that's making them wavy and paint crack and bubble in some areas and now I got sick and been coughing for over a week now and finally made a doctor appointment the thing is my landlord doesn't believe me because the people upstairs are so nice and their best tenants and they would never do something like that everyone says I sound crazy but I live here and see and hear everything that goes on so that's what I'm dealing with today going on 4 months there's alot more to the story but way too much to put
Ness - 26-May-21 @ 9:31 PM
Since moving into my council flat 7 years ago,I have had constant and daily problems with the people living in flat upstairs.shortly after moving in,the woman upstairs sent her mother to knock on the door and ask me if I'd swap with a relative of hers who lives in a maisonette and couldn't manage stairs very well.when I said no and told her that I also have problems with stairs, they started withe the noise.slamming doors,dragging furniture across the floor,allowing their child to jump up and down and stamp his feet whenever he moves around,even when the child isn't even in,the stamping continues.they watch me whenever I go out,even with my dogs. I can no longer do the garden because they stand and watch me.I've tried contacting the council but they just keep telling me to fill inan incident diary.I've already filled in 6 of them,and handed them in personally,but they said they haven'treceived them.on a couple of occasions, I admit I did bang on the ceilingbecause the noise was unbearable. They contacted the council and I got a phone call the same day.when I asked why I had been contactedso quickly, I was told that certain incidents,such as assault or verbal abuse was dealt with quicker,but all I had done was knock on the ceiling.they must have told the council lies.in am a 57 year old woman,with arthritis and a bad hip.and since moving into this hell hole have not had one bit of help from the council to stop the noise.I now suffer from depression andanxiety,and am very reluctant to go out anywhere in public,as these people have other family members living in the flats next door and opposite me.
Kay - 5-May-21 @ 3:42 PM
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice...
Title:
(never shown)
Firstname:
(never shown)
Surname:
(never shown)
Email:
(never shown)
Nickname:
(shown)
Comment:
Validate:
Enter word:
Latest Comments